Adult Children of Addicted/Alcoholic Parents | Forum profile

The recovery process initially starts out something along the lines of: "I'm such a bad person, no one loves me, I'm a failure, I can't do anything right" These are emotions turned inwards - negative emotions turned inwards can lead to suicide. As recovery proceeds, we end up more in a place of "You did this to me, it's your fault, you were the one who did these dastardly deeds, you you...

Everyone here has done an amazing job and I'd second everything they've said. This all sounds so familiar to me. I used to be the same way. But I leapt into a marriage -- to an alcoholic, just like AF!! -- that was seriously unhealthy and ended badly because he wound up having an affair with a woman I considered a good friend. I blamed myself for a while for that, thinking if I'd been a good enough wife it wouldn't have...

Quote: Originally Posted by tanyavolt I have lost all respect for anyone that takes part in these activities. I can understand your feelings here. Both of my parents were drinkers. Looking back, it was useless to feel anger, resentment or shame for their drinking. It does not and cannot change a drinker's obsession or stop others in the family from denying and enabling the addiction. One important thing I learned here was the three...

Thankyou very much for your advice, I am considering sometime soon visiting some places here, and I'm sure I'll check those sites out. I know my story might be different from others but it's the best idea I had to talk to people who might possibly relate, as none of my closest friends have gone through anything like I have.

Iam an adult child of an alcoholic too. It isn't fun. I would advise going to alanon.The alcoholics lie and know you know they are lying and they still lie. I learned not to react to them and not to engage with them when they are using. I would protect my money,credit cards etc. and press charges if he steals from you. The disease is progressive. You sound very wise. I hope you do not have to live in this situation too much longer.

Quote: Originally Posted by dwats JBR, I do have a question for you now so I hope you see this. Are you still doing the TEA forms and if so how often do you do them? Thanks. Hey Dwats, Yes i am still doing them and this may be a repeat post as I saw you asked me the same question on another thread here. I try and do them daily but don't always get them done. I am also getting into the counter exercise from the book. Give it a try on days...

I've heard this a few times in recovery and don't understand what it is they are talking about.

Abandonment issue's are not a joke! They come and go... Mine are so bad, it seem just when I began to trust a person I lose them in some kinda of way! Sometime I sabotage before getting close to people, the fear of abandonment is horrible. I really do not have any suggestions because I'm working on mine through prayer.

thank you all for your replies. I have recently become involved in church where i am able to relate and get support from several ppl there. ive been looking for a therapist who specializes or at least knows about ACOA's.. i cant find any in my area that have it listed under there specialities.. a few others ive asked they say.. oh all therapist know about that, pick anyone.. I doubt it... I really think I would benefit working through...

Hi utopia, I have crashed and burned from several jobs in my life. As an ex-social worker once told me about her experience with job burn out, "you're always or usually the last person to know..." I could not agree more with what she said. Patk