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Critiques | Forum profile
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Forum profile page for Critiques on http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk.
This report page is the aggregated overview from a single forum: Critiques, located on the Message Board at http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk.
This forum profile page summarizes the general forum statistics such as: Users Activity, Forum Activity, and Top Authors, which are reported in either a table or graph below for a given reporting time period.
Additional forum profile information for "Critiques" on the Message Board at http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk is also shown in the following ways:
1) Latest Active Threads
2) Hot Threads for Last Week
Warning: These statistics are generated using 'best efforts' and can experience delays and reporting errors at times. Please note that such statistics do not constitute a forum's popularity and/or exact posting volumes at any given reporting period.
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Posting activity on Critiques:
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Week
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3 Months
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Threads:
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24
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103
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322
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Post:
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83
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372
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1,387
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Critiques Posting activity graph:
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Top authors during last week:
user's latest post:
Untitled Novel, Ch 1 Pt 4 (More...
Published (2009-11-07 21:17:00)
Part 4 of 5. Almost to the finish line! We last left our heroine in the Coliseum, having witnessed her two comrades defeated in a pairs tournament. __________________________________________________ _______ Jaspar opened his eyes and pouted, and Jewels, returning in mind to the Coliseum, agreed with his assessment. Light filled the combat area as the Darkfall dispersed. The two stood and made their way with the silent crowd down the stairs...
user's latest post:
Out Of The Dark
Published (2009-11-09 21:22:00)
Urrr! Wrong answer, but thank you for playing! OK, I've stuck in a few 'Alien' references along the way as red herrings, but I promise you this isn't the same territory (or 'Event Horizon' either). I'm back on nights this Wed. so should have a chance to advance the story by mid week.
user's latest post:
Just a little something...
Published (2009-11-10 18:33:00)
@Ursa major -- thanks, just the removal of that one word instantly makes it read better to me .
user's latest post:
Just a little something... -...
Published (2009-11-10 20:02:00)
Quote: Originally Posted by Ursa major gives the same impression, is more immediate and - for cyberpunkdreams's (CPD's) benefit - contains one less word. ( ) Two words Ursa, not just one, but what I wrote** was from off top of my head based on what I read in first para. Like a bad first draft, you almost always put out these sort thing. ** I feel Ursa that you like to pick my writing. I don't mind, because it not only teaches...
user's latest post:
Just a little something...
Published (2009-11-10 04:17:00)
"They race right to be bone out there" 'the' ?? --- FWIW, I found it sucked me in. The poetic stuff, the ragged tenses didn't bother me, they were pieces in the puzzle, camera angles in the instant movie... Um, would take a better grammarian than me to be sure, to be sure, but I'd say you're using 'You' in the sense of the old-fashioned 'Thee' & 'Thou', or...
user's latest post:
Short story
Published (2009-11-08 12:06:00)
Quote: Originally Posted by The Judge I did wonder if she was telling a friend what had happened with the 'by the way' -- in which case you could usefully make more of that perhaps, and address the friend in the story, ie say 'you were right' or something of that kind. Yeah, that's why the story's called 'This is What Happened...' Maybe I should make that a bit clearer! Quote: By the non sequitur bit, I...
user's latest post:
Just a little something... -...
Published (2009-11-10 21:25:00)
Quote: Originally Posted by ctg Two words Ursa, not just one, but what I wrote** was from off top of my head based on what I read in first para. Like a bad first draft, you almost always put out these sort thing. One word: the original sentence had ten words, my alternative has nine. (See: I told you I become very picky. ) And yes: if only we could generate perfect prose at the first attempt. *sigh* Quote: Originally Posted by ctg ** I feel...
user's latest post:
Just a little something... -...
Published (2009-11-10 23:04:00)
Quote: Originally Posted by Ursa major In trying to make my own writing into close 3rd person, I have liberally sprinkled it with he heards, she saws, it felts and so on. I have to be tough with myself over this and it leaks out into some of my Aspiring Writer posts. The only person it's really directed at is, sadly (because very necessary), me. Well, may I just say how grateful I am that it has leaked out Ursa, because I was doing...
user's latest post:
Out Of The Dark
Published (2009-11-05 06:20:00)
Hang on, it is on earth...now I'm confused. I thought it was a spaceship, it is a spaceship...it's an earth based control, looking out to space...perhaps you'd better just ignore me. I still like the setup, though. Apologies for idiocy.
user's latest post:
Demon - Prologue
Published (2009-11-05 01:10:00)
Thanks, got 3 of them on the back of my head 666
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Latest active threads on Critiques::
Started 2 days, 13 hours ago (2009-11-10 02:05:00)
by ctg
Quote:
Originally Posted by cyberpunkdreams Just something I'm working on. This isn't for publication per se (not that it would even necessarily get accepted anywhere if I tried!), it's more like background material for a different kind of project. My big problem with writing is that I find it relatively easy to create a scene, but I really struggle with plot stuff, ...
Started 14 hours, 24 minutes ago (2009-11-12 00:48:00)
by TheEndIsNigh
Hi and welcome to the Chrons. I haven't seen an introduction thread but if you have one, I'm sorry, I missed it.
I can be really picky, (though there are those that say I'm only playing at it). Please forgive if it seems to severe.
All the critiquers on this site are only trying to help. Red remove Blue General comments Green possible suggestions All are only opinions....
Started 1 week ago (2009-11-05 04:12:00)
by reiver33
Out Of The Dark I've obviously been watching too many old films recently... One It was one of those background conversations that, for some reason, stand out against the general hubbub and attract your attention. One of those conversations that mean trouble; headed your way, and fast. Busted Flush, Busted Flush, this is Antarctica Traffic Control. Are...
Started 2 years ago (2007-11-03 01:47:00)
by dustinzgirl
I loved it. Wish there was a bit more imagery type stuff, but other than that, it was too cool.
Started 1 week, 5 days ago (2009-10-31 09:38:00)
by Teresa Edgerton
Moved thread to Critiques, since that's where you need to be to attract the critiquers.
Your formatting became a little strange where the dialogue began. You do know that you generally need to begin a new paragraph when someone speaks, don't you? (You seem to have figured out that we need blank lines between paragraphs because we can't indent here, so that's why I ask -- because you're ...
Started 5 days, 19 hours ago (2009-11-06 19:53:00)
by Nik
Whoo !!
FWIW, did you wake, grabbing for a note-book with this one ? It has a dream-like surreallity, an internal logic that made my goose-bumps rise...
Started 2 weeks, 2 days ago (2009-10-27 00:04:00)
by ctg
Gary, although its much better, I'm a bit annoyed on how you haven't done your background checking on what weapons Mossad could be using at back in 1953. At time IDF had access to the old classics like UZI , FN FAL and DROR ( Light Machine Gun). The light machine gun your team leader is carrying is a support weapon and from my experience it's very heavy to be 'brought on your cheek'. A IDF ...
Started 2 weeks ago (2009-10-28 16:00:00)
by tigerlily14
End of First Chapter of The PAST Wish Alight here's the end of the first chapter, which is admittedly more like a prologue, since the main characters aren't really introduced....but this should answer some things, like the cat. The smoke cleared and Crystal, Chris, Pinchardi opened her eyes again. Now she stared out a window looking out onto the ocean. Waves rolled in, ...
Started 1 week, 6 days ago (2009-10-29 19:13:00)
by Damiynn
Dragon's Eye C7 pt 2 Alsonar cursed loudly as he felt the release of the magic binding Noraxxis. Anger swirled through him like a whirlwind, stealing away all other thoughts. It had to be today. Giving the reigns in his hands a savage jerk, he yanked the mighty black under him to a halt. With a mental raking of his mind he ordered the powerful black speeding ...
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Hot threads for last week on Critiques::
Started 2 days, 13 hours ago (2009-11-10 02:05:00)
by ctg
Quote:
Originally Posted by cyberpunkdreams Just something I'm working on. This isn't for publication per se (not that it would even necessarily get accepted anywhere if I tried!), it's more like background material for a different kind of project. My big problem with writing is that I find it relatively easy to create a scene, but I really struggle with plot stuff, ...
Started 1 week ago (2009-11-05 04:12:00)
by reiver33
Out Of The Dark I've obviously been watching too many old films recently... One It was one of those background conversations that, for some reason, stand out against the general hubbub and attract your attention. One of those conversations that mean trouble; headed your way, and fast. Busted Flush, Busted Flush, this is Antarctica Traffic Control. Are...
Started 5 days, 19 hours ago (2009-11-06 19:53:00)
by Nik
Whoo !!
FWIW, did you wake, grabbing for a note-book with this one ? It has a dream-like surreallity, an internal logic that made my goose-bumps rise...
Started 1 week, 5 days ago (2009-10-31 09:38:00)
by Teresa Edgerton
Moved thread to Critiques, since that's where you need to be to attract the critiquers.
Your formatting became a little strange where the dialogue began. You do know that you generally need to begin a new paragraph when someone speaks, don't you? (You seem to have figured out that we need blank lines between paragraphs because we can't indent here, so that's why I ask -- because you're ...
Started 2 years ago (2007-11-03 01:47:00)
by dustinzgirl
I loved it. Wish there was a bit more imagery type stuff, but other than that, it was too cool.
Started 2 weeks, 2 days ago (2009-10-27 00:04:00)
by ctg
Gary, although its much better, I'm a bit annoyed on how you haven't done your background checking on what weapons Mossad could be using at back in 1953. At time IDF had access to the old classics like UZI , FN FAL and DROR ( Light Machine Gun). The light machine gun your team leader is carrying is a support weapon and from my experience it's very heavy to be 'brought on your cheek'. A IDF ...
Started 14 hours, 24 minutes ago (2009-11-12 00:48:00)
by TheEndIsNigh
Hi and welcome to the Chrons. I haven't seen an introduction thread but if you have one, I'm sorry, I missed it.
I can be really picky, (though there are those that say I'm only playing at it). Please forgive if it seems to severe.
All the critiquers on this site are only trying to help. Red remove Blue General comments Green possible suggestions All are only opinions....
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