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Why don't you do it on a weekend? You could go to his place, ring the bell or knock on the door. You certainly will know what to say, after the initial excuses for possibly bothering him. If you don't want to do this alone, you could go with a friend. Indeed it is better not to go alone on this first time. Good luck!

You mean HE lives off of you. Since June. So you are the sole support of this guy and you and your child? No wonder he doesn't want to leave! He's not going to find another woman willing to support his worthless butt! Leave him, move back in with your parents and have the D.A. go after him for child support. It won't cost you a thing. If he doesn't get a job and pay, he'll wind up in jail. Do this before things get...

How old are your parents? Based on your age they might only be in their 50's or early 60's. That's too soon to start mourning potentially losing them. They might very well be around for 30 more years...your lifetime! I agree with Red's advice to see a doctor. It doesn't hurt to take a little help over the rough spots. Your new house isn't your home yet. Are you near your Mom? Could you include her in shopping for...

Among other things, your wife is projecting. She has behaved in a very untrustworthy way so she assumes it will be very easy for you tod os o as well. Perhaps her guilt for contacting that old boyfriend during that fight of yours is so strong that she cna't deal with it and instead is projecting it onto you. but whatever reason, I strongly suggest couples counseling. You can't change her behavior, only she can do that. But you can...

This has been one of the more interesting and controversial posts I've been reading. I love a neat, clean and organized house, but doing it myself is my least favorite thing. I used to be able to afford a maid to come in once a week, but I found out over time, she was lazy. When I really get down to cleaning my house, it takes me about 12 hours, so I do it over several days. The cleaning lady would do my whole house in 2 hours and charge...

Pendulum - yes thats true, if I do tell him (either before or after) it will just be as a fact, no apologizing or feeling guilty. I believe every past relationship makes you who you are today (even mine with James) and I will try to explain that to him, but I know deep down he won't agree. he frustrates me so much sometimes! he is alpha male in terms of his theories (man is breadwinner, woman should be able to stay home to raise a family...

I had to do a doubletake.....there are 2 brokenhearted's brokenhearted 83 and brokenhearted 43 I'd move out and let him live with the kid and grandkid

I have a feeling it's gonna take something big to get them to actually break up and stay broken up. They seem very enmeshed and very dependent on each other. I don't know what I mean by "something big," just something that's not just talks about it here and there. I can't see either of them leaving unless someone starts cheating on someone or something dramatic happens, but that's JMO. I could be wrong.

Quote: Originally Posted by pendulum It is so difficult to give advice about very general rather than specific issues, and in particular when you can't see the person who is asking for advice. My impression is that you need more fun and pleasure in your life, and maybe less worries. I think it would help you to start doing some body work - anything you can do with your body rather than your mind/brain - so you can become more...

I hate passive aggressive behavior. It drives me nuts. It's no way to treat a person. I would rather the person talk to me like an adult and tell me what I'm doing that's bothering them, rather than act passive aggressive. Whenever someone is acting passive aggressive my best advice is to say "hey, listen, I am more than happy to try and change whatever I'm doing that's bothering you if you will simply talk to...